I am still amazed by the things I hear prospective adoptive parents say and I was more amazed at some of the things said by persons in our travel group about the kids, cleanliness, having accidents, etc. and it made me wonder if they paid attention during their Hague training. Many of these topics were covered. Is it meant to deter you? NO! It is meant to PREPARE you. I am a very realistic person and do not tend to see the world through rose colored glasses, so some of the things we experienced in China did not upset me. I am so very thankful for our Hague training, our excellent social worker and for websites like LWB. Here is a post from LWB in their Realistic Expectation series they are doing. Anyone about to adopt from China should read it:
Realistic Expectations: Cleanliness
Here is another one about toilets, toilet training and the bathrooms…or lack thereof…in China:
Realistic Expectations: Potty Training
And, here is another one I enjoyed. While in China a group of ladies came up to us and told us we needed to put “two clothes” on Lillian. She had a pair of sweatpants, two layers and a coat on and it was only 72 degrees. I kindly thanked them. This article sheds light on why the children are so bundled and that it is not necessarily a bad thing. Many orphanages and homes are not heated and it gets very cold in many parts of China. In order to keep the kids well and stave off colds and pneumonia, they get bundled in many layers. Many cannot afford to treat their children if they get sick and many, many, many do not have access to healthcare or doctors. We let Alex stay in his stinky clothes for two days because he was upset and did not want to be parted from them. We just hoped the hotel and our travel group understood. I saved them for him and they are in a box of things I think he will want when he gets older. So, here is another good article on understanding the Chinese culture:
Realistic Expectations: Clothing
Thank you LWB for posting these articles. These are very educational and will help many prospective adoptive parents understand their child’s culture and why they do the things they do. Many times here in America, we have such a Western ethnocentric view and we forget that the rest of the world lives completely different than how we live.
Andrea
Our Adoption Journey 