Ok, so if you don’t like to read rants, you probably should just go ahead and click the X in the top corner. This entire post is a rant.
We left for China nine months from today. I have had two Asian, non-english speaking, non-westernized toddlers in my home for over 8 months now. They were not potty trained, they wet the bed randomly or the floor or anything else…they did not like our food, they were grumpy, weepy, whiny and it took a while for us to get adjusted. Everything is not perfect now, but it is better.
If I could count or have $1 for every time someone raked me over the coals for not answering my phone, I would be a VERY, VERY rich lady. First, I would like to say that I bought a cell phone for MY convenience and not everyone else’s. If you leave me a message that says “Call me back” and nothing else, more likely than not, I won’t call you back. I have a life. I have had to potty train, set boundaries, reinforce boundaries, teach English, am a full time student at NSU, took 3 condensed summer classes, vacationed at the beach (which was NOT A vacation for me), try to keep the house clean, kids’ clothed, do my homework, make it on time to all doctor’s appointments (3 or more a week), be a good wife to my husband and spend time with him, AND YOU are wondering why I did not respond to your very generic message? I am very jealous of my time and everything I do has a time slot. It is the only way I can survive. If you call me and don’t tell me why, I am not going to call you back and be held captive on the phone for 30 minutes when you could have accessed Google for the SAME EXACT information you are asking me for. Generally, my friends know that if they want to talk or if they need a question answered, they will leave the message on my voicemail or text/email me the question so I can answer when I get a moment. A little patience please. A little understanding. However, I find that when people don’t leave a detailed message or they just say “call me” they generally find the answer later or don’t have anything good to say and I just wasted 2-30 precious minutes on the phone. That may not seem like a lot to many, but in order to finish up at NSU, I have to be jealous with my time.
The second thing that just burns me up is when someone says “You didn’t have time to call me back, but you have time to scrapbook?” Well, YES! Scrapbooking is enjoyable. Returning your call because you want the latest gossip about something (don’t ever call me to gossip. I might say some very rude things….ruder than normal) or are too lazy to look up the information online, is NOT enjoyable. Scrapbooking IS enjoyable. It IS therapy. It IS something I do everyday for about 20-30 minutes FOR ME. Because nothing and I mean NOTHING else in this life do I do for me. Everything is about everyone else, especially my kids. My few minutes a day to work a small project is ME time. It is generally in the mid-morning before all of my other obligations encroach. I have scheduled time for it. I make sure I do something to keep my sanity.
So, if you call me and I don’t answer, don’t be offended. I am probably cleaning up poop off the floor, slipping in a puddle of Glade Alex thought he would spray on the floor to see what happens, trying to teach Alex not to hoard or take other people’s things, homeschooling my 8 year old, doing homework (I have FIVE classes this semester), washing clothes, cleaning my house, at a doctor’s appointment or any other random thing that might have gotten thrown at me that day. Have a little compassion. Steven jokes with me, he said if my patience was as big as a lasagna noodle when we first adopted, then it is down to angel hair pasta now!! This is very true. I cannot wait until school starts next week. I NEED A BREAK! MY KIDS NEED A BREAK! So, for all of you who have taken me to task for not answering your phone call, if you really want to talk or ask a question, you can come by and sweep my floor or do a load of clothes while you talk. That would be helpful.
Thank you. I am done now.